Dear Nichole,

When you came into my life, your diagnosis of Down syndrome threatened to crush my heart. That tiny extra 21st chromosome seemed too powerful for me to stand up against. I cried constantly, and I feared our lives would be covered with limitations.

I wanted to wake up and find that you were a “normal” baby, that Down syndrome was part of a bad dream. But it wasn’t a dream. Your almond shaped eyes – the obvious physical sign of your diagnosis – seemed to remind me you were different every time you looked at me. Then one day, I thought you were looking not just at me, but straight into my heart.

I don’t know how to describe this to you, so I will do the best I can. It was as if I had been dreaming for most of my life, and then you came in and you woke me up. Love, joy, and peace became almost tangible. I felt as if my eyes had been opened to the real things that matter in this world.

Maybe I had a “distracted heart” and then you showed up ready to fix it and show me the way.

Not only did you awaken something inside of me; you changed me. God, using you – a little baby girl with Down syndrome – to touch the places of my life that needed to allow Him in.

I look at you now, and  Down syndrome, although it does not define you, is something in you that I cherish. It is something that I celebrate. I would not change a thing about you. Every single chromosome you have is absolutely perfect! You are exactly who God intended you to be, He created your inmost being.

Thanks to you, I realize that disability is not to be feared, but that every life is to be celebrated. Thanks to you, we adopted your sister, a step of faith and trust as we knew little about cerebral palsy. What we did know, thanks to you, was that her life was meant for celebration too. Oh how you have taught us about celebrating life! Something this world could use a little bit more of.

I wish I loved more like you, and that I gave my hugs as freely as you do. I wish I celebrated others with the same excitement you show. You changed me, inside out, and I am blessed to have you my sweet girl.

Love,

Mom