I’d Pick You!

I have this little thing I say to my son.  I’ve said it for years. It’s a Mommy thing. Something that he can hold on to during yucky days.

You know, the days when…
the entire class is picking on him
and he got a 60 on the spelling test
and he has to write the entire report again because his writing is sloppy
and his tag bothers him but no one will cut it out

and he can’t get the words out
and there are no chicken nuggets left
and everyone else can have ice cream but him
type of day.

I want my son to feel loved and wanted and know he is amazing.

One day many years ago I said to my son: “Jonathan, do you know if I lined up EVERY boy in the WHOLE entire world, and I had to pick just one to be my very own…do you know who I’d pick? I’d pick YOU!”

This has become kind of a ritual with us. I don’t say it every day, but at least a couple of times a week, when we’re snuggling and feeling warm and fuzzy.

The other night, when we were cuddled on the couch, I began my little, “Jonathan, do you know if I lined up EVERY boy in the WHOLE entire world, and I had to pick just one to be my very own…do you know who I’d pick? And he answered “You’d pick me!” (it’s evolved to the point that he answers the question now).

But this time he asked, “Mom, are you sure you’d want me? Even though I have autism? Would you still want to pick me?”

Oh precious son of mine…

The answer is:

YES

every time
without a doubt
no hesitation
no thinking twice
no regrets

I’d
pick
you.

***

Donna Aumann Cooper is a SAHM living in East Tennessee with her husband, Michael and very special 14 year old son, Jonathan.  Jonathan is diagnosed with Autism, Type 1 Diabetes, Hashimoto’s and Alopecia.  She has a dusty but uplifting blog: AWEtism…Life on the BRIGHT SIDE of the Spectrum! where she writes about  her joy in the journey.